I have been going through a rather odd phase. some may say it's an age thing. I choose not to believe those evil, evil people. Some may say it's the moon's cycle. I choose to slap people like that. Some may say, it's just what happens - we go through phases. Makes far more sense.
Well before you think this is a post that's not about me, let me expand.
Bad choice of words, because that's the first phase I'm in - one of expansion. When my 20-year high school reunion (insert scream here) was announced, I decided to make sure I looked as pretty as possible and started a vigorous gym regime. I joined the gorilla's in the pit and flung my three-kilo dumbbells around with the energy of a Jack Russell on diet pills. I never allowed the ogre next to me benchpressing his friend who was benchpressing weights at the same time to intimidate me. Feeling lean and pumped (for about three minutes after leaving gym) I started thinking that I could really show the fellow almost-40-year-olds I matriculated with that you didn't have to turn into a beer-guzzling oros man after leaving school.
I even started spinning. Which I loved. Who wouldn't? You wear tights and fling yourself around to gay music (except for the one instructor who thought playing 'Loslappie' was a scream). Spinning and flinging weights around were good. Were.
Then winter hit, and I suddenly found every excuse under the freezing sun not to go near the gym and to pile every carbohydrate into my mouth I could instead. Suffice to say that all my hard work and the one or two muscles I was actually starting to see when I stood in a certain position and in the right light, have disappeared into the same void my abs are.
I tried on a pair of shorts on the first sunny weekend and let's just say they wrapped themselves around me far more snuggly than they used to.
So my period of expansion must come to an end. I will no longer eat fries like a shark in a feeding frenzy and will try not to eat FJ's food while he isn't looking. I will return to the gorilla pit to fling the (let's up it to 5-kilo's shall we?) dumbbells, and will try fit into my cycling shorts that will probably make me look like I have boobs as my "tyre" rests on its waistband.
Another phase I'm going through is a vegetarian one. I'm trying not to eat anything that has lived previously(except for fish - man can not live without sushi). I have this sudden need to preserve the preciousness of life and try not to deny anything else that breathes (in air or is referred to as a mammal) it's chance to reach old age.
I know what you're thinking - me, a vegetarian. Do not stress, I'm not turning into a lesbian.
And the final phase, which is probably the one consuming my mind the most, is what some would call "a crisis of faith". I'm not ready to blog about it just yet, but my worldview feels as if it's shattered and I'm slowly picking up the pieces of a life that's slightly clearer than it was before.
But I'm keeping mum on that one.
Happy Monday y'all
14 comments:
yay to you being back.
dont know what to say - snaps on your vegetarian-minus-sashimi-phase.
Im also in the midst of a phase thanks to your advice(which was rather good). Its called the boys-suck-and-not-in-the-good-way phase.
Alas - sorry to hear about your shattered faith phase. I hope it isnt related to the coming nuptuals and being forbidden to wear sequins and boas. Have a cookie and then get your ass to the gym. Thats an order.
Shattered faith phase... mmm been there for some years now.
Don't do sushi and could never be a vegetarian. Like meat... and men.
:)
what about chicken? does chicken count? it's not a mammal - so it's okay, right? right?
Cm from JHB - cookie and gym. Think I'd prefer the cookie, but, alas, I did get to gym yesterday and am struggling to walk today.
Wenchy - Men and meat... well, when you put it like that...
Willie - yah, I'm partial to noshing on the odd chicken carcass. But trying to hold out for a while... but after two nights of fish I may feel the need to eat flesh
I followed your link from Shayne's "Time Out" blog. Just wanted to comment that I'm in exactly the same phase as the first one mentioned in your post. My motive was a boat trtip early in the year. I looked fab, then came winter and I'm just fat and sad again. Trying to get into the groove again but oh how difficult to say no to life's litte temptations! Good luck with your battle(s) :)
It was also our 20 year reunion a month or so ago. And I have also been undergoing a phase of expansion lately (being pregnant tends to do that).
My question, why can't they hold these reunion things earlier in the year, like just after summer. That way you have done all the hard work to be summer ready, you have a tan and winter has not taken hold! Honestly - no consideration in the planning of these things. Don't they know I thought I was looking pretty hot in March/April!!
Haha... snap!
On phase 1 - I'm organizing my matric reunion as I was headboy of Wordsworth High in 1990. Looking forward to it and don't expect to do much gyming in between.
On Phase 2 - I'm feeling like you on phase 3... not too sure I want to plunge in and can braai'd beasties but feeling like that's where I'm headed.
On Phase 3 - Read my articles http://www.deonbarnard.net/let-me-introduce-myself/ and http://www.deonbarnard.net/3-reasons-to-give-up-religion to see how I made a radical and difficult transition of philosophy.
Keep up the great blog
I don't mean to put a spoke in the wheels, but don't fish breathe? Somebody I like very much, though, has this to say about vegetarians: "There must be something wrong with people who think it's better to eat food that can't run away and hide."
xx
I went to my 10 year High School Reunion last weekend, and it was an absolute blast. Of course I didn't want to go, but it was worth it. (I was forced by my only remaining school friend.) Most people gained a few extra kilo's, but the nice part was that nobody cared. And everyone was over their school shit, so it was nice just to have a "fat" old chat with the peeps.
Good luck with everything.
Juz
*have no words....* but feel traumatised by some of this post and helpless too. I guess thats how one feels when one of your family is having a crises.
I feel like i just want to grab you and hang onto you for dear life so you aren't swallowed up and sucked in...{hug} Ciao. Lisa
Michelle - ah, I'm glad you could relate... I think winter is an undefeatable battle. The carbs will always win.
Ordinarylife - luckily my reunion is in April, so I should be god-like by then...
Deon - sounds like you've been through an interesting journey. Popped onto your blog and read the articles. Look forward to reading more!
Shiny - tee hee! It's a phase. I'll soon be devouring little animals.
Justin - you know, that's what I suspect. I think it may actually be a good thing to see everyone as slightly more mature than the idiots we were at school.
Lisa - your post made me a bit tearful. I haven't spoken much of how weird I feel inside. Perhaps I should post about it... just too scared to say what I'm thinking. I'm not being sucked in though. This journey has honestly been consuming my mind. Lots of thought going on...
It must be our age....I have been hitting the gym HARD the last 6wks. Although the scale swears at me (I have gained 60g!) I am looking less like an overbaked muffin in my skinny jeans and thats gotta count for something!
On the crisis of faith...ja boet...its a tough road - we knew it wasnt for sissies. Crises of faith can be an opportunity for growth and renewed intimacy.
On the flipside its a groovy opportunity for ol' nick to whisper sweet nothings in your ear.
Strongs to you Clive
xxx
When it comes to the whole "fitness and veg" thing, I blushingly say nothing. Can't, cos I battle to do any from of exercise, and eat pretty much anything except fried egg whites.
On the faith side, I think both my daughters said it very well for all of us.
Don't go, please. . .
{hugs for today} Thinking of you. Ciao...Lisa.
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